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An article by Tria Chang recently surfaced on the Huffington Post, where she expresses her frustrations and disappointment with the prence of white male-Asian female relationships and how they are rooted in fetishization, violence, and colonization?. In it, she details her experiences with being romantically involved with non-Asian men (though it would come to no surprise if she is alluding solely to white men), albeit being fully cognizant of the hyper-sexualization of Asian women and how racist it is. She then goes on to talk about how she struggled with internalizing racist views of Asian women—she felt she was an anomaly and thereby unattractive, and thought that attraction towards women like her was a kink.

Tria Chang最近在《赫芬顿邮报》上发表了一篇文章,表达了她对白男亚女关系的盛行的沮丧与失望,以及白男亚女关系是如何根植于拜物教、暴力和殖民主义。在这篇文章中,她详细描述了自己与非亚裔男性发生浪漫关系的经历(尽管毫不奇怪的发现所谓的非亚裔仅仅是指白人男性),虽然她充分认识到西方国家中的亚裔女性被过度色情化,以及这种现象是多么的种族主义。然而她却在接下来的文章中开始谈论如何努力的接受了这种对亚洲女性的种族主义观点——因为她觉得自己曾经并不符合主流审美,所以没有吸引力,所以认为白男对像她这样的女性的觉得有吸引力是一种怪癖。

Tria Chang and her fiancé [CHIARASHINE PHOTOGRAPHY]

Tria Chang和她的未婚夫

After she dated a string of racist non-Asian men, married and divorced an Asian man, and dated another, she found herself attracted to a white man and is now engaged to him. She detailed how her relationship with him developed from that of acquaintances to partners and reveals that he, like other non-Asian men she has been romantically involved with, has had a history of dating Asian women. When confronted about it, her boyfriend got defensive and, like most men who pursue Asian women, gave a typical excuse: he “never thought about it.” Like a plethora of articles written by women like her, who choose to shoulder the burden of educating white men—much like the Beauty attempting to reform and tame the Beast from his misguided and ignorant ways—she proceeds to reprimand him for his behavior and remains wholly devoted to him. She concludes the article by expressing content with her current situation and alludes to how different her current relationship with her partner is from other white male-Asian female couples.

在她和一系列操作----与一串的种族主义的非亚裔男性们约会、和一个亚裔男性结婚和离婚、和另一个亚裔男性约会----之后,她发现自己最终还是被一个白人所吸引,现在他们订婚了。她详细描述了他们的关系是如何从熟人发展成伴侣的,并透露对方就像她曾与之有过恋爱关系的其他非亚洲男性一样,有过与亚洲女性约会的历史。每当谈到这件事时,她的男朋友就变得很抵触,闭口不谈(因为怕被认为是黄热病)。就像大多数追求亚裔女性的非亚裔男性一样,关于这件事他有一个典型的借口:他说他“从未想过这件事”(和亚洲女性相处)。当然,同时也有像Tria Chang这样的女人写了大量的文章,她们勇敢的肩负起了教育白人男性的重任——就像美女(《指美女与野兽》)试图通过改造和驯服,让野兽从错误与无知的歧途上回返——她一边发文章谴责他的行为,一边却对他真心投入。在文章的结尾,她对自己目前的处境表示满意,并暗戳戳的表示自己目前与伴侣的关系与其他白男亚女是非常不同的。(嗯,别人都是绿茶,就你是白莲)

At one point, she refers to his defensive reaction to her calling him out on his dating history as “one of those hot white guy traits”. What on earth are “hot white guy traits,” and why is it relevant to what she’s been talking about?

文中Tria Chang提到,她男友对她追问他的(和亚裔女性)约会史时给出了一个理由,称这是“热情白人男性的一个特征”。神TM的“热情白人男性的一个特征”,这也能是答案?

Why is the onus on Asian women to educate white men, who continually benefit from white supremacy? The very idea that other options are possible, ones where the burden of reforming white men’s racist and sexist behaviors and biases can be alleviated or completely eradicated, even if they have been previously explored, do not seem to cross these women’s minds. Why should any white man wish to change, outside of some measly, superficial attempts at placating his partner, when he undoubtedly benefits from his position at the top of a white supremacist racial hierarchy? Despite being hurt by white men’s willful ignorance when it comes to racism and their role in perpetuating and remaining complicit with the racist structures, notions, and cultures that they have imposed on Asians and other people of color, it seems that being intimate with white men is still quite a viable option.


Even Chang admits:

甚至Tria Chang还提到:

“It took me a little while to figure this out, but once I became more settled in college, I met my first Asian boyfriend, who ended up being my husband. Sadly, he also became my ex-husband. This relationship was followed by one with another Asian male. Suffice it to say, I went a decade without the thought of white men or Asian fetish even crossing my mind. Now it’s something I think about every day, because of said fiancé.”

这花了我一点时间才意识到这一点, 当我在大学里稳定下来后, 我遇到了我的第一个亚裔男友,后来成了我的丈夫,再之后变成了前夫。之后我又与另一个亚裔男性开始交往。 可以这么说,十年来我从未想过和一个白人或一个黄热病白人结合. 但现在,因为我的未婚夫,我每天都在考虑它。

While engaging in discourse with other users online, a number of notable Tweets stood out:


【Celeste Ng:有一些亚洲男人积极地寻找和骚扰亚洲女性,因为他们认为我们是“逆向种族主义者”——据说是因为我们胆敢找外族人为伴侣,因为我们有混血的孩子或本身就是混血的,或者是我写的关于不同种族结合的文章。
Celeste Ng:这里的问题不是女性是否屈服于种族主义。这里的问题是男性认为他们可以控制女性,特别是他们自己种族的女性。这是隐藏在反种族主义的面具后面的恶毒。这是狗屎。”】

【Celeste Ng:如果你一直在关注我最近关于在亚洲AM社区中的针对性骚扰和敌对女性的推特,并希望能有所帮助。就应该像路易斯说的那样,站在骚扰受害者(所有种族)的立场上。关注写这篇文章的人,倾听并学习。例如Louis:
Writer Louis Leung:向前看。和我们并肩战斗。它超越了种族。这是为了对抗那些敌对女性的行为。这是为了对抗欺凌。关注
@sential oung并理解她的痛苦。】

This phenomenon is not new. A plethora of Asian American women, faux feminists, and pseudo-intellectuals have regurgitated similar talking points against Asian American men and, more specifically, expressed their disdain for any and all criticism of white men-Asian women relationships:




【Aesthetic Distance:我没说亚洲女性对白人有优待
Skim otakon GG-06:你的确没说过
Skim otakon GG-06:我也并不认为考虑一个和白人约会的亚洲女孩是不是有白热病有什么帮助,但是】

【Skim otakon GG-06:感觉把这些人统一贴上物欲或者同化的标签并不好
Aesthetic Distance:这是一个不错的反驳,但是白人真的是唯一的选择吗?】

【Skim otakon GG-06:在我看来,美国目前的社会规范很大程度上是为了自然地把每个人与白人联系起来。白人文化是主流。
Skim otakon GG-06: 看白人写的《权力游戏》或其他节目比看韩剧更有意义。
Skim otakon GG-06: 看《权力的游戏》可以用来和陌生人聊天,但韩剧只会让人们告诉我他们对韩国的了解有多少。】

【Skim otakon GG-06: 我不是纯血的亚裔美国女性,然而种族主义不允许我们崇拜美国的主导种族……
Skim otakon GG-06:这让我不知道还能和谁作伴或说话,所以……】

【bb ruth:想告诉对于任何一个说《致所有我曾爱过的男孩》(这本电影是一部亚裔内部争议很大的电影,因为除了女主角外包括她的六个男友和她父亲(她妈早死)一个亚裔都没有!!到是有黑人(但是个同性恋)。甚至原著更甚,只有白人。) 对亚裔并不重要的人,你知道在电影中看到一个亚洲女孩像一个正常的美国女孩一样,没有任何不同的对待,是多么的令人耳目一新吗?

Crazy(not rich) Asian:无论是或不是,不幸的是,我们的亚裔身份所带来的反应可比电影里复杂多了。

bb ruth:虽然我认为他们肯定能做得更多,但我认为这是一个很好的第一步。我们不应该忽视和否定这部电影对一些亚洲女孩来说有多重要,仅仅是因为它并不是围绕着她的亚洲身份而展开的。

bb ruth:我个人觉得作为一个亚裔女孩,这部电影对我很重要,因为很多次,当我与白人或其他非亚裔人互动时,有些人过于关注我是如何成为亚裔的。

bb ruth:尽管我很喜欢我的亚裔身份,但我希望PPL(不知道是什么,网络翻译是女同的意思,但不通)首先将我看成一个普通人而不是亚裔。但PPL看到我是亚洲人,就会自动地将我分组,并根据这种异国情调或一些刻板印象将我孤立起来。】

【bb ruth:是的,有时候这种白男亚女配的原因是白男崇拜,但有些时候这只是爱情而无关种族

bb ruth:对那些在白男亚女关系中拥有真爱的女孩来说,这是非常令人沮丧的,她们最终被亚裔社会指责为“逆向种族主义”或“白人崇拜”,而事实并非如此。

bb ruth:听起来Lana有这样的个人经验】

【ultimate ??:我们能别装得好像把亚裔男性全称为混蛋有什么激进的好吗,要不我们来讨论下我们社区中对女性的敌对情绪,家庭暴力,以及对亚洲妇女的剥削?】

【ultimate ??:《致所有我曾爱过的男孩》里你最喜欢谁?
ultimate ??:我昨天看了一遍《致所有我曾爱过的男孩》,今天也看了一遍,我迫不及待地想明天再看一遍,然后后天再看一遍。】




Even Ng expresses this problematic view in a Tweet back in 2015:

Celeste Ng:是吗?但诚实的说,我并不认为亚裔男子又什么吸引人的。(他们让我想起了我亲戚)】

Upon viewing these Tweets, one might wonder what is wrong with these claims, since sexist and racist Asian men do exist. But while the users vehemently speak out against the misogynistic and patriarchal behaviors of Asian men, they seem completely supportive of works like To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before, a film featuring an Asian American girl whose love interests who are white-passing. Save for the token Black boy, who is conveniently homosexual, they all adhere to the Eurocentric masculine ideals. Much like the token men of color on mainstream television shows like The Bachelorette, the single man of color in the film is not a viable partner. Despite the rise of movements like #MeToo, created by Tarana Burke to address sexual harassment and assault against women—one where the behaviors of prominent white men were called into question—there appears to be little to no criticism of white men’s abuse of privilege and power. Considering that a vast majority of these women are born or living in Western countries, specifically the United States, institutionalized white male patriarchy is far more prent and influential than Asian male patriarchy.

一看到这些推特,人们可能会疑惑:这些说法有什么问题吗?因为性别歧视和种族主义的亚裔男性确实存在。但是,尽管这些推特用户强烈反对亚裔男性的敌视女性和父权制行为,但他们似乎完全支持像《致所有我曾爱过的男孩》一样的作品,这是一部以一个亚裔美国女孩为主角的电影,描写她对白人的爱情。除了政治正确加上的黑人男孩(而且还是个同性恋),其他都是白人。就像主流电视节目《钻石单身汉》中象征性的加了一个有色人种男性一样,影片中的有色人种也不不过就是个衬托用的背景板罢了。尽管塔拉纳·伯克(Tarana Burke)为解决对女性的性骚扰和性侵犯而创立的“Metoo”运动越来越广,但对于白人男性滥用特权和权力的行为似乎几乎没有什么批评意见。考虑到这些妇女中绝大多数出生或生活在西方国家,特别是美国,制度化的白人男性父权制必定对她们施加了比亚洲男性父权制更为强大影响力(从而使她们考虑问题更偏向于白人男性)。

Look at these following Tweets, one made from Celeste and one made from Jenny Han, author of To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before:

再来看这些推特,第一位是《致所有我曾爱过的男孩》的作者Jenny Han。之后是华裔作家伍绮诗

【Jenny Han:我向@Meghan McCain, @cindymccain,他们的家人以及所有爱他的人表示最深切的哀悼。他对这个国家的贡献不会被遗忘】

【Celeste NG:这就是为什么我要告诉你这个故事:当年我12岁的时候,我害怕那个人。现在,作为一个成年人,我的看法有点改变。
Celeste NG: 90年代早期的克利夫兰不是一个快乐或繁荣的地方。钢铁工业正在衰退,经济不景气,到处都是颓废之气。
Celeste NG: 这个男人喝醉了。他似乎无家可归。他是一个黑人,而克利夫兰是一个种族主义严重的城市。
Celeste NG: 现在回想起来,我怀疑他是个兽医。我记得他穿着一件军装,可能上过朝鲜战场或越南战场。
Celeste NG: 我要说的是,这个人很痛苦。很明显他经历了很多事,他一只手有些溃烂,看上去十分穷困潦倒。
Celeste NG: 他心情必定十分压抑,想要找一个对象来让他发泄怒火。我们当时就在那里。因为我们看起来就像外国人,所以我们很容易就成为了目标。】

Celeste NG: 然后,当我们靠近时,他猛烈地咒骂我们。他是如此的痛苦,怒不可遏,不得不对某人大发雷霆以发泄心中的情绪。
Celeste NG:为什么我要告诉你这个,你可能会问这和那个糟糕的特朗普竞选主席有什么关系?
Celeste NG:她当然是个种族主义者。不幸的是,特朗普的许多支持者都是这样。这是个问题。但种族主义植根于恐惧和伤害。
Celeste NG:那个竞选主席是扬斯敦人。扬斯敦多年来一直在经济上受苦。所以那里的人们四处寻找可以责备的人。
Celeste NG:他们把责任推到那些看起来与他们不同的人身上——肤色、宗教信仰、性取向。这不是第一次了。

Celeste NG:他们把责任推到那些看起来与他们不同的人身上——肤色、宗教信仰、性取向。这不是第一次了。
Celeste NG:是的,种族主义是个大问题。但是请记住这些人为什么是种族主义者也是很重要的,这样我们就能解决这个问题。他们只是在害怕。
Celeste NG:我们需要比他们更有同情心。我们不能像他们那样害怕

Notice how different the tone is, despite the fact that both of these men have clearly externalized their racist views towards Asians. McCain has unabashedly justified his usage of the term “gook,” a racial slur that is often thrown at Koreans and Vietnamese. He fought in a war where soldiers were instructed to murder as many Vietnamese civilians as possible? and were free to rape Vietnamese women and girls??. Jenny Han, a Korean American herself, appears content with overlooking that aspect of his history and hails him as a hero. Likewise, in Ng’s experience, a Vietnam war veteran verbally abuses her and her family with racial slurs, yet she urges others to respond with the kind of sympathy and understanding that she refuses to give Asian men who also suffer under white patriarchy.
The language used in the e-mail Ng received was unacceptable and the individual in question, if Asian, should be shunned by the community. But for her to take the action of a single individual or vocal minority and generalize this behavior to apply to a collective of Asian men, weaponizing her followers with false narratives that harm and defame Asian men is not acceptable either.
While engaging in related discourse with people online, she also received a comment from a white man spewing racists against Asian men, and surprisingly enough, she fails to unabashedly condemn his behavior and centers herself instead.

注意这两位女士前后两种语气有多不同。尽管事实上Jenny Han 悼念的这两个男人都明显地表露了他们对亚洲人的种族主义观点。麦凯恩毫不掩饰地证明了他使用“gook”这个词的正当性,这是一种经常针对韩国人和越南人的种族歧视用词。他参加了越战,在那场战争中,士兵们被命令尽可能多地杀害越南平民,并且可以自由强奸越南妇女和女孩??。Jenny Han,一个韩裔,她本人似乎满足于忽视他的战争历史,并称赞他是一个英雄。同样,根据Ng的经历中,一位美军越战老兵以种族歧视的口吻辱骂她和她的家人,但她敦促其他人以同情和理解的方式作出回应。但她却拒绝给予同样遭受白人父权统治的亚洲男人以同等待遇(指之前其他亚洲男性因她嫁给非亚裔指责她为种族叛徒,然后她说这些人是bullshit而不是同情)。

The You're Fat Guy:我的亚洲妻子是亚洲人,所以我很感激她根本没有被亚洲男人和他们的小阴茎所吸引。太好了!
Celeste Ng:我觉得你在开玩笑,但是弱肉强食的刻板印象是导致这些亚洲MRA(男权主义者)采取这种立场的原因之一,所以请不要这样说,即使是开玩笑。

Her overall lack of empathy for the hurdles that Asian men face, to which she has directly contributed with earlier statements emphasizing that she does not find them attractive, can be seen again in the following Tweet:



She even wrote an article for The Cut to address the events that transpired??. In it, she acknowledges the hurdles that Asian men face while navigating through the world and how she has only exacerbated the negative stereotypes afflicting them—a tactic similar to “lampshading”??, where a writer expresses self-awareness about racism, homophobia, etcetera, through humor while failing to critique or challenge bigotry—but ultimately continue to paint diasporic Asian men as race purists, misogynistic overlords, and abusive.

“Acknowledging bigotry is not the same thing as critiquing bigotry.”


— from Pop Culture Detective’s “The Adorkable Misogyny of The Big Bang Theory”

— 来自 Pop Culture Detective的 “《生活大爆炸》中另人厌恶的“蠢萌””